This is a job application.

HIRE ME!!
please :)

In all seriousness, and to be completely transparent with you, stranger who scanned this QR code off a flyer, I have been on the job hunt for almost nine months. I have sent out at least 300 applications. I have scoured almost every job board you could imagine, reached out to recruitment agencies, tried to wrangle friends and family to ask about job openings within their circles, and all I have received from hiring managers are scraps. It’s a good day when I get an email back from an HR department, honestly. A message stating that I have not moved on to the next step of a hiring process may be tough to read but at least it is an acknowledgment of my existence. It has been ROUGH and I’m at a point where I don’t know what to do next. Every morning I wake up and think: How can I make myself more marketable? How can I be louder? HOW CAN I MAKE YOU, HIRING MANAGER, NOTICE ME!?

 

After reading hundreds of job listings and applying to over 300, I know what you want and I am certain I can be the employee and coworker you need. Not to toot my own horn but *TOOT TOOT* I am an absolute delight!! My ability to work as part of a team is one of my greatest strengths and I have multiple references that would agree I am a joy to be around both professionally and platonically. I love that working on a team allows me to take on new and varied responsibilities, whether it’s being a leader, a follower, or maybe just the comedic relief to keep morale up – I adore taking on every new challenge given to me and working hard with others! Additionally, I am a creative thinker, artistic, a fast learner, a self-starter, fluent in Adobe Creative Suite (Illustrator, Photoshop, InDesign, Premiere Pro, After Effects), organized, and my attention to detail is unmatched. Those TikTok filters where you have to color match? I get 100% every time. If you want a coworker who is going to not only work hard but also notice every time you get a haircut or your ear gauges slightly upsized, I am your person! PICK ME! HIRE ME!

 

Would you like to learn more about my over nine years of experience in marketing, communications, design, customer service, and sales where I have honed my skills in creating and managing visually compelling multi-channel campaigns, developing brand identities, and designing engaging print and digital materials that resonate with diverse audiences!? Awesome! Here is my resume!

 

If you are still reading, you are the sweetest angel and I could give you a forehead kiss (with HR’s permission, of course). I would now like to briefly talk about what I am looking for in an employer and workplace.

 

Ideally, I would love a position where I can work remotely. I have been working remotely since 2019 and I know how to manage my daily responsibilities while also being conscious of the time and workload of others. A full-time position at a workplace that has benefits and health and dental insurance would bring me to tears of joy. But, I am also enthusiastic to take on freelance and temp/contract roles. I am open to jobs in both the private and public sectors. I believe a great colleague is someone passionate, has good communication skills, actively shares new ideas, and believes in a collaborative environment. If you value listening and learning from others, I think we would work beautifully together.

 

Please feel free to send me an email if you have a contact you would like to connect me with or know of a position that would be a good fit for me!

 

Thank you so much for your time! You are kind and radiant and I truly hope you have the most superb day!!